Friday was our follow up meeting with the RE, and I think I feel better. Actually, I'm really not sure how I feel. I know we have a new plan. I know he told me not to give up and that he thinks I will defintely be able to get pregnant and have a baby. He told me that he'll tell me when it's time to give up. He asked me to hang in their emotionally. I told him, as I choked back tears, that I was really trying to. We discussed that there was no way to know for sure why the betas were going up, and then went back down. There is no real way to know why I'm not staying pregnant. And that means no real concrete answers.
He reminded me I have frozen embryos. And at that point I asked if we could do another fresh cycle so that we could make more embryos. He supported that idea. But, with a twist. He wants to put in 3 day embryos. Everything inside me cringed at that idea. Everyone online has the idea that a 5 day embryo is better than a 3 day embryo. It has developed more, it is expanding, hatching, it's been given more time to see if it's better quality. But, I am also aware of the less popular theory that some REs like to put embryos back at 3 days to get them back to their natural environment.
My RE explained that with IVF they have been able to put the sperm and egg together, but the problem they always had was the medium to grow the embryos in. It's not like you can just put them in agar and expect them to grow. Scientists have experimented with changing the medium and have been able to grow the embryos out to 5 days. The theory was that if you could get them to 5 days, then the rate of pregnancy would increase. According to my RE, the numbers never really went up. He says doctors are heading back to the 3 day embryo.
I searched the web and looked for supporting evidence for the benefits of the 3 day transfer. Instead I found mostly forums talking about 5 day transfers, and one dialogue between a woman with infertility and a doctor who per his words was "on a soap box" against 3 day transfers. I'm going to put my trust in our RE once again, and try the 3 day transfer out. It can't really go any more wrong than what we've been doing.
So the plan is to do a fresh cycle with a 3 day transfer. We'll freeze the rest and if emotionally I can't handle doing anything for a while, we'll be able to come back to it without having to worry about not having enough embryos. For now, I just have to wait until the bleeding starts. AF will be bittersweet.