Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Butterflies In My Basket

This Friday we go in for an ultrasound to see if I'm ready to start progesterone. If my lining is thick enough, we should expect to do the transfer on July 5th. The Brain has picked up the baby blanket she began crocheting during our last cycle. I suppose this is her way of coping with having the idea that we may be pregnant again soon. She's coping better than I am. Instead of nervous excitement, I'm scared. I'm afraid we'll have another BFN. I'm afraid that we'll have a BFP that will end in a m/c. I'm sad that IF has made this process about fear and caution rather than joy and abandon. I have to center myself, find my little zen place and stay there. Maybe it's in the pile of stuff next to the bed. I'll have to dig deep below the pillows to find it.

Being a nervous nelly,

1 comment:

  1. It's impossible to go through this crap and not be scared. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!!