End of Year Ramblings

I put myself on BCP when AF finally showed up after my canceled IVF cycle. I wanted to be able to decide when I start this who IVF thing again. I have one more pill left in the pack before the vitamin pills begin. I will start the New Year and a new cycle this week. We'll see if I put a call into the RE to actually start a new cycle. It really depends on a lot of things. I have always chosen trying to have a baby over everything. I've passed over a lot of opportunities and have nothing to show for it. Well, I'm trying to embrace life, reduce stress, and be happier and healthier. Part of this is trying to get the heck out of my current job. I interviewed on Thursday for a position in the post anesthesia care unit for a 3-11p.m. position. It would be a new challenge (I love learning new things) it would be a better more human schedule (imagine not having to sleep during the days and having a circadian rhythm) and it would be less stress (yes, I believe this to be true). I find out on Tuesday if I get the job. I don't know how long orientation is, so I don't know when I'd be able to do IVF. If it has to be delayed, I'll write my RE and tell him that I'm trying to make some positive changes in my life that I believe will positively effect the chances of a successful cycle. The stress of the job and working nights can't be good for my reproductive health. I'm trying not to get excited because I'll be very disappointed if I don't get the job. This would be such a giant step to a more positive new year. I'm putting the pain of multiple pregnancy losses and the canceled cycle behind me. Wish me luck!

Santa

This year, I'm not asking Santa or the Chanukah fairy for a baby. This year, there is nothing that I really want, except to be with my friends and family...and that's not something you can box and wrap up in bright colored paper.